Let's Bust a Recap : Antony and Cleopatra

Oh boy, time for more Shakespeare. This year's tragedy was Antony and Cleopatra, and I think next year we're going to hit either our re-read of Julius Caesar or Romeo and Juliet because I've had a tough time with the last two tragedies I've read, and I need next year's to be a winner. But we'll circle back to this at the end of today's post. 

So Antony and Cleopatra...where to begin? We open our play to learn that Antony has got it bad for Cleopatra and has neglected all his responsibilities to be at her beck and call 24/7. Like, he's off sleeping with Cleopatra in Alexandria and letting Rome go to pot and not caring two figs that his wife Fulvia died after rebelling against Octavius. 

But Octavius is all, "Enough of that. You need to get it together and come help me put down some pirates that are wreaking havoc around here." Naturally, Cleopatra doesn't want her boy-toy to leave her, and we get a lot of angsty back and forth between her and Antony about him leaving. 

But he does, in fact, leave.

He meets up with Octavius and Lepidus (the two other guys in charge of Rome), and they agree to set aside their differences to deal with the pirates. While everyone's feeling good about each other, Octavius' general Agrippa suggests Antony should marry Octavius' sister to keep everybody friendly. 

This is obviously a terrible idea, but of course, they do it because Antony has no qualms about being monogamous or anything ridiculous like that. Enobarbus (Antony's right hand man) is the only one who sees the absolute trainwreck that is about to ensue because he knows there's no way Antony is giving up what he has with Cleopatra, and he famously details Cleopatra's irresistible charms saying:

        "Age cannot wither her, nor custom stale

        Her infinite variety: other women cloy

        The appetites they feed, but she makes hungry

        Where most she satisfies."

Then we have a scene with a soothsayer who warns Antony that he will for sure lose if he ever tries to fight Octavius which is important because foreshadowing. 

Meanwhile, back in Egypt, Cleopatra finds out about Antony's marriage to Octavia and she throws a royal hissy fit wherein all her lackeys assure her that she is gorgeous and Octavia is garbage. Which calms her down. Not in time to save the messenger from some serious abuse, but who cares about him, right?

Then we have a big confusing mess wherein Antony, Octavius, and Lepidus (the three guys in charge of Rome, remember?) end up not fighting the pirates and making a deal with Pompey (one of the pirates) that he can keep his land as long as he flips on the other pirates and also he has to send tributes to them. To which the other pirates are all, "Bro, why don't you just wreck these guys and take over Rome?" But Pompey's all, "Nah, that wouldn't be cool." And then there's this big drunken party, but then Octavius and Lepidus (without Antony's knowledge or approval) attack Pompey anyway. 

So why did we even just go through all that?

Antony heads back to Alexandria and crowns himself and Cleopatra as rulers of Egypt and his share of Rome and also complains to Octavius that he owes Antony more land from his recent war with Pompey. Oh, and he's not happy that Octavius kicked Lepidus out of the triumvirate and threw him in jail.

 

You see what's happening, right? Too many cooks in the kitchen.

Octavius is like, "You go ahead and be king of Egypt, but that's it, kiddo." To which Antony is like, "It's go time, son."

So they're gearing up for a showdown, and Antony's people are like, "You will lose at sea; fight on land." But Antony's all, "Octavius dared me to fight at sea, and I'm no sissy." And Cleopatra chimes in with, "My whole navy is yours."

But then they go to battle and Cleopatra runs away with her fleet of ships and Antony follows her leaving all his men behind to get slaughtered. Which he's a little embarrassed about, but hey, the kisses of Cleopatra are worth it.

Yikes, bro.

Octavius ends up sending a messenger to Cleopatra asking her to give up Antony, and she starts FLIRTING WITH THE MESSENGER which, naturally, Antony walks in on. He rages for about two seconds and then forgives her and promises to fight another battle for her, this time on land.

At this point, Enobarbus who is pretty much the only guy that's been unreservedly #TeamAntony this whole play is finally like, "I'm out." And heads over to Octavius' side. But Antony just gathers all Enobarbus' stuff and sends it to him with a "No hard feelings, my man." Which kills Enobarbus because he's so ashamed of his own disloyalty. Literally. He dies.

Antony loses the battle. (Foreshadowing, remember?) And then he has a major temper tantrum and swears off Cleopatra because this is all obviously her fault and only hers.

Cleopatra decides that the way to win Antony back is to send a message to him that she killed herself, dying with his name on her lips. So she goes and locks herself up in her tower and waits for him to come rushing back to her.

Bad move, sis.

When Antony gets the message, he decides his life isn't worth living anymore and he begs his boy Eros to kill him. But Eros won't do it, and instead kills himself. Which Antony thinks is just the most honorable and brave thing he's ever seen so he tries to kill himself too. 

Except he's an idiot and only manages to mortally wound himself. 

So he's sitting there bleeding out when he finds out Cleopatra isn't even dead. They hoist him up to her in her little tower and he dies in her arms.

Is it over? Not yet.

Cleopatra has now been placed under a Roman guard since Egypt has been defeated by Octavius and she tries to kill herself, but the guard gets the dagger away from her in time. Octavius shows up and is all, "No worries, we're going to treat you right." But one of Octavius' own men is like, "Nah, sis, he is going to parade you around like a caged animal." 

So then we get a lot of Cleopatra being bitter, envisioning her humiliating life under the rule of Octavius. And then she pulls a poisonous asp out of her basket and kills herself by having it bite her. Her two servants die too. Octavius finds them all there and feels kinda bad. But not really all that bad because now he's free to become the first Roman emperor aka take over the world. So he gives her a nice funeral. The end. 

I mean, holy moly. I think we all know that Shakespeare is the king of dysfunctional relationships, but Antony and Cleopatra take it to the next level. They are equally screwed up, and it's wild. This play was difficult to get through just because there's sooo much jumping around. All Shakespeare's plays were obviously meant to be seen on the stage, but this one in particular needs to be seen acted out, not just read in my living room with me trying to keep track of where everyone is and who's loyal to who. Antony and Cleopatra has one of Shakespeare's biggest casts and keeping everyone in line gets a little tricky. I was constantly flipping back to the cast list to figure out who was who.

That being said, this one was way better than Troilus and Cressida and I would recommend giving it a go with the caveat that it would be best read in as few sittings as possible so you're not lost every time you come back to it. Which is really true of all Shakespeare's plays if we're being honest. 

Anyway, circling back to the beginning of this post, I think next year I'll be reading Romeo and Juliet. My ultimate goal is to read Shakespeare's entire body of work. I read Romeo and Juliet and Julius Caesar in high school and thoroughly enjoyed them both, but when I undertook to read all of Shakespeare, I decided that I would re-read those as an adult as part of this undertaking. I've been saving them for when I need a win, and I think the time has come. We're officially down to six comedies and six tragedies, so let's just keep this train rollin'!