Y'all. Yesterday, I bought a stick of deodorant off the internet for $12. I'm not sure if I've lost my mind for good or if I'm just that desperate for some good deodorant. But I somehow found my way to this blog post about the top 5 best deodorants for women and the next thing I know, I'm buying overpriced armpit perfume over the computer. I've tried just about everything there is out there, and here's the conclusion I've come to: the deodorant industry is a total scam and the societal pressure to not walk around smelling like a normal person is one big hoax designed to get us to spend our money and stress-sweat on stuff that is just going to condition our bodies to need more of it hence spending more money and stress-sweat which causes us to think we need more of it because of all the stress-sweating. Vicious cycle. I'm very skeptical about "all-natural" products, but they have a money-back guarantee if I'm not 100% satisfied for any reason so what have I got to lose, right? I'll keep you posted on this.
As if we hadn't already zoomed past the TMI sign 3 miles ago and are now lost in the land of "Did she actually hit Publish on this post?!", I've also decided to tell you that my tolerance level for BS goes to zero when the time of my uncleanness is upon me. I don't know why patience is the first virtue to eighty-six it when my special lady time comes around, but bless my husband for sticking with me for 62 months of this madness so far. I'm not sure why he keeps loving me, but I'm thankful he does. Can I get a shout-out from all the other hormonal women out there living with saintly men?
Okay, we have got to bring this train back into the station. How did we even get here?! I apologize for the total lack of decorum today. Here are some cute photos courtesy of the '90s that will hopefully distract you and make you forget everything you just read.
I mean, come on. How cute are those kids?!
- The Real Threat : Me.
- Wedding Hashtags : I don't know why this made me laugh so hard, but it did. No offense to all you cute couples out there.
- #imomsohard : I want to be friends with these girls.
Did I overshare today? Any of you ladies have a deodorant you swear by? What virtue leaves town when you're not feeling well? I can't be the only human being to have trouble with that....